How Important Are Looks?

Hi Babe,

I've been sitting here at my desk reading some of my mail and I see that a lot of letters are kind of in the same vein. You think that because you aren't Peggy Lipton or Elizabeth Taylor or even the Queen of your prom, no one likes you.

What nonsense!

I think the time has come for me to big brother you a little. I wish I could sit by your side and put my arm around you and just hold you tight while I tell you this story. I can't right now, so you'll just have to read this and pretend. But do pretend, okay?

TALKIN' 'BOUT YOU! - First off, you are beautiful. You! Right there! Yes, you!

Just because you don't knock people down with your looks (and be glad you don't...those kind of girls are the unhappiest in the world), it doesn't mean you aren't beautiful. Every person has something about them that's beautiful. You do too. If you don't think so, it's just because you don't look close enough at yourself.

Now, let me tell you about what happened to me once.

When I was in high school, I used to date a very nice girl. I really liked her. She wasn't super good looking - in fact, she was rather plain. But she was nice and she knew how to talk about lots of subjects and she laughed easily - that's always important - and I really dug her.

STUPID MOVE - But one time, when we had a date, I did something really stupid. I'd asked this girl to go out with me and I knew she was kind of counting on it, even though we were just going to the show or something.

One of my friends came to me and told me that a really beautiful girl, the most popular girl in the class, liked me and wanted to go out with me but I never asked her and she didn't know why.

Well, I was knocked out. I couldn't believe this girl would want to go out with me. So I called her up and before I knew it, I was telling her I'd pick her up at 7:30 and I just couldn't believe it.

Then I remembered my other date and I called her and said I couldn't go because I wasn't feeling well.

I picked up the popular girl that night and we went to the show and out to dinner. But then a terrible thing happened.

THERE SHE WAS - We were standing in the theater lobby getting popcorn when all of a sudden I realized I was looking right at Sue, the girl I'd broken the date with. Sue had gone to the show with her brother so she wouldn't be sitting home on a Friday night.

Well, I didn't say anything except "hello" because I couldn't. Sue had seen me with Vicki and there was nothing I could do.

It would have been different if Vicki had been really neat but unfortunately, she wasn't. She seemed to think that her beauty was all she needed in life and once I got over my fascination with her looks (and that passes pretty quickly), I thought she had a pretty drippy personality and frankly, she wasn't much fun.

A REAL HEEL - Sue didn't date me very much after that. I can't blame her. I was a real rat. Besides, she found another boyfriend who didn't do foolish things like I'd done.

Unfortunately, I didn't learn any lesson right away. I did the same thing to other girls a couple of more times. But finally, one day it hit me that the most popular girls aren't really the neatest at all.

Now, I shy away completely from girls who appear to be really too great for words because once I take them out, I invariably find they aren't. I look inside a girl before I even consider dating her.

So if you aren't the most beautiful girl in the class, don't worry about it. Work on your personality. Be kind and be quick to laugh. Smile a lot and do the most with what you have.

Guys will love you for it!

Until we're together, lots of love,
Bobby