Hi Babe!

This morning when I was sitting in my dressing room on the "Brides" set, I was kind of worried about what I'd write to you this month. Even during filming, when my mind should have been on the scene, I found myself thinking about you.

Anyway, after I finished for the day, I scrubbed off my make-up and I was heading towards my car, still thinking about this column, when a girl walked up to me and introduced herself and said she was a fan of mine.

I thought she wanted an autograph but she looked up into my eyes, then quickly looked down, and asked in a voice that was barely a whisper if she could talk to me for a few minutes. I parted her long hair out of her face and raised her chin with my hand and I could see she'd been crying.

TERRIBLY CONCERNED - Well, I was flattered that she thought of me as a big brother but I was also worried that maybe she had a problem I wouldn't be qualified to help her with and I was terribly concerned for her. I took her hand in mine and led her over to a quiet corner of the lot where there's some grass and trees and we sat down. Jan, that's her name, started telling me her problem.

"Bobby, have you ever been tempted to do something that you knew was wrong and that would get you into trouble and still you went ahead and did it anyway?" she asked me, blotting away her tears.

Jan and her girlfriend had gone to school that morning and on the way to their first class, they'd passed some boys in a car who said they were cutting for the day and invited them along. Jan said she didn't want to go but her girlfriend agreed and then they all called Jan a "chicken."

IT WAS WRONG - Rather than lose face, Jan got into the boys' car and left with them though she knew it was wrong. Now she was terrified that her parents would find out or that her teacher would catch her and she just didn't know where to turn.

I promised Jan I wouldn't tell you any more about what she'd done so I can't break my promise...but I can tell you (like I told Jan) what I did when I got caught in a similar situation.

I don't know what it is with some people...they don't look into their own heads very well...but they think it's funny to stick others in the position of having to do something wrong or be put down for being a "chicken."

A GAME ON PEOPLE - When I was in school, it was a game to do that to people. If you didn't do something like cheat on a test or cut a class or pass a note or something, you weren't one of the popular people for very long.

I used to like to have parties. My parents were very cool about not intruding but they did have one rule: no liquor.

One week I invited the most popular people in the class to my party and they said they'd come! Before I knew what was happening, they were planning to bring liquor and I knew it but I didn't tell them not to because I was afraid they'd stay away.

STARTED DRINKING - That Saturday night, two of the guys showed up with a couple of bottles of liquor and they started drinking. Immediately I knew it was wrong to allow them there. But I didn't say anything because I was afraid. Then I started thinking about what could happen if I didn't tell them to stop and you know what? By the time I finished adding up all the consequences, I discovered I'd lose a lot more than my pride.

I gathered all my nerve and I walked over to where they were sitting on the couch and I said, "John and Frank, I know I didn't say anything to you earlier but now I've thought about it and I have to ask you to either throw away the liquor or you'll have to leave."

John and Frank really started putting me down. "What do you mean? You knew we were bringing stuff with us!" they kept shouting. "What are you? A chicken?"

GETTING SCARED - I didn't know what to say and they didn't leave and I was getting scared and I thought about letting them stay anyway. But I realized that would be wrong so I asked them again and still they didn't do anything. Finally I got really furious. I mean FURIOUS. I ordered them out and they left. So did most of my other guests.

But before I could clear out the liquor bottles, my parents came in to see what was wrong. I told them what had happened and I explained how first I didn't say anything but finally I'd thrown John and Frank out though I knew I'd lost face with the entire crowd. My parents were pretty upset with me but they were very cool about it and from then on, they trusted me even more.

So I told Jan that she should go home, explain what she'd done and why she'd done it and tell her parents that she now understood all the consequences and that she wanted to tell them before they found out from someone else.

DO WHAT'S RIGHT - And I want to tell you, Babe, that when you find yourself in the same situation, whether at school or at a party or on a date or whenever you are tempted to do something wrong, you should be yourself and do what you know is right, no matter how much pride you think you might lose. In the long run, I know it's worth it. Don't you agree?

Until we're together,

Love,
Bobby